Tomorrow

"What?"

"Tomorrow has been cancelled."

"What do you mean?"

"Tomorrow has been cancelled."

"So.. there won't be a tomorrow?"

"Exactly."

"So.. what happens tomorrow?"

"Nothing. It's cancelled."

"Why?"

"Because of flooding."

"So.. the world is going to end?"

"No."

"No?"

"Yup."

"Huh?"

"It's not," The Representative of the Days explained patiently. Then, when he noticed the blank look on The Mundane Humans face, he added, "going to end."

"Ah-hum.. er.. would you care to explain, please?" asked the Mundane Human.

The Immortal Representative of The Days sighed. "Tomorrow has been cancelled because of flooding," he repeated for the nth time.

"Then what happens?"

"Why, we jump straight to the day after tomorrow, of course."

"So, tomorrow isn't tomorrow, but the day after tomorrow?"

"Yep," he nodded.

"So, tomorrow isn't Tuesday, but Wednesday?" asked the Commonplace Human with a puzzled look on this face.

"No, tomorrow is still Tuesday."

"But you said tomorrow has been.. uh.. cancelled."

"And it is."

"So howcome, then, that tomorrow, that should be Tuesday, still is Tuesday?"

"The day that should be Wednesday has been moved one day forward to Tuesday. And the day that originally was Thursday is moved forward to Wednesday. And so on."

The Banal Human contemplated this for a while. "Ok. So there's only 364 days in this year?"

"No, this year still has 365 days. The day that should be the first of the next year is moved forward to the last of this. And so forth."

"Ah. And how long will this shifting of days go on?" asked the Ordinary Human.

"Until we run out of days."

"When is that?"

"Not in the forseeable future," said He Who Never Dies and Represents The Days.

"But when we do run out of days, the world will end?"

"That is a reasonable assumption."

The Trite Human went home and spent the rest of his life trying to calculate how many days there were left and thus when the world would end. Then one day he died.