Humble Hijacker

A man dressed in black is walking forward the aisle in a plane. The plane is, incidentally, flying in the air, as they tend to do sometimes. The black suited man makes his way towars the cockpit. He enters quietly and stands silently behind the pilots, regarding them for a while.

"Hi," he says. The pilots both turn to look at him, a surprised look on their faces.

"What -" one of them starts, but is interrupted by the man in black.

"Hi," he repeated, "I hate to bother you, but I'm afraid I'll have to hijack this plane."

There is stunned silence in the cockpit for more than half a minute. Then the other pilot says, "Why?"

"You see," the man explains, "this is not the flight I was planning on getting. Sadly, it was full. So instead, I must hijack this flight. Please accept my apologies."

"Er.." the same pilot says, not quite sure what to say. When he realizes he has nothing worthwhile to say, he closes his mouth. The man smiles at the pilots apologetically.

"Please," he says, "Let me address the passengers. While you plot the new course." He gives the directions. The pilots contacts air traffic control for instructions, and gives the man a microphone.

His voice booms through the plane. "Hi, can I have all passengers attention please. All passengers, attention please. I'm sorry to have to inform you this flight has now been hijacked. Please remain calm. We are heading towards a different destination than originally planned. I apologize for any inconvenience this may cause. Any passengers unhappy with these arrangements can jump out the back of the plane, where a waitress will be waiting to help you in case of any temporary hesitations. Thank you."